Funeral

*I wrote this yesterday, and the sun was shining again today :)*

The sun is shining for the first time since last Saturday.  Summer in South Africa is rainy season, and though the rains were late in coming, they came with a vengeance.  I confess (and this may shock some of you), that I did not mind having the coolness the rain brought for a little while.  But this morning, as I dragged myself out of bed at 6 to attend the funeral of my neighbor across the street, I was not very happy for the rain.  I never met him, but here funerals, like so many other events, are a community event.  Mama Jane and I were over there yesterday chopping cabbage for three hours.  Petunia had only recently been talking about how it is so significant for the community for you to attend events-seeing you at their weddings and funerals means you are one of them.  I kept reminding myself of that as I grudgingly pulled on more clothing than I’ve had to wear since I got to South Africa two months and one week ago.

We walked outside and our street had turned into an ankle deep creek.  There was no way around it, we simply had to trudge through it to get to our neighbors house, and then again to get to the bus that was hired to take us to the cemetery.  I may as well have not worn shoes, as my boots, socks, and leggings were immediately soaked through and through.  On top of that, I had left my umbrella at my friend’s house in Pretoria, and the only one Mama Jane had to offer me was her granddaughter’s umbrella.  I must have been quite a site-the only white person there, standing in the cemetery with a tiny pink Hannah Montana umbrella.  It was pretty classic.  The affair only last a couple of hours because all of us did not fit in the tent that was set up for the meal, so they gave it to us to go and sent us home.  I was steeling myself for an at least half day event (I have been to a six hour long graduation and a five and half hour long church service, so it’s not implausible).  We were not able to hear any of the sermon, and I never even managed to speak to the man’s nieces and nephew, whom he raised after they were orphaned by AIDS.  But I was there, which is all that matters to the community.  Yet another lesson in incarnational living-most of the battle is simply showing up.

Learning to Receive

Anybody who knows me, probably knows that I am not very good at receiving.  (I think I've gotten better in recent years, though).  I enjoy my illusion of being independent, and not having to rely on anyone.  I think lately, God is trying to pry that away from me.  In reading the story in Luke 21 of the widow giving her two coins, we were posed with a question I had never considered on reading this passage: how can we affirm the poor in giving the little they have to offer?  It makes me uncomfortable, receiving, especially when I know the sacrifice it requires from others.  Yet after that challenge, I decided to give it a try.  After all, when we receive from others, it affirms that they have something valuable to offer.  One of the commitments in InnerCHANGE is to humility, and God is teaching me to humbly accept that others have something to offer, and that I need them to offer that. 
Whether it is a few rand from my neighbor to thank me for baking him cookies, or a lollipop from kids who have very little money to spare but choose to share it with me, or company on a walk I should not take alone, I am learning to affirm that their gifts are worth giving.  That they have something to offer to others (even a comparatively rich white girl).  Indeed, that they should offer to others. And hopefully, in accepting those things, large and small, God is prying away that illusion that I am self-sufficient, and the prideful feeling that I am the one who has something to offer.  Thank goodness I don't.

Why I Believe in Incarnational Ministry, Part 2

I believe that incarnational ministry leads to being able to more effectively and relevantly serve the poor.  However as InnerCHANGE founder, John Hayes, points out, it is not merely a methodology, it is also a message.  He states, “When we move into a poor neighborhood, we send the message that if love is costly, then those who are the object of such love are worth much.  This is especially important to the poor, who bear the weight of the world’s low opinion of them.  GK Chesterton wrote, ‘No plans or proposals or efficient rearrangements will give back to a broken man his self-respect and sense of speaking with an equal. [But] one gesture will do it.”  A phrase I’ve heard repeatedly is the medium is the message.  Beyond any programs we may implement and activities we may take part in, the mere fact that we have consciously chosen to link our fate to that of our poor brothers and sisters speaks volumes.  If you have to earn the right to be heard, that is a powerful way to earn that right.  When your neighbors see you living with them, suffering with them, and celebrating with them, they are more likely to be willing to hear what we have to say.  

Further, I am convinced that our call to serve the poor goes beyond effective development strategies.  Jesus could have, with simply a thought, healed everyone.  But he didn’t do that.  When a woman who had been bleeding for years touched his cloak and was immediately healed, he could have kept on walking-the job was done. But he wasn’t content with just a physical healing.  He saw her spiritual needs as well.  He stopped and he engaged her.   He wasn’t interested in the role of impersonal “service provider,” but wanted to speak to, touch, and engage those who healed.  In that way the healing was not just physical, but spiritual.  Christ’s ministry was nothing if not relational.  It’s easy to look around at the need and be driven to address it.  You could spend all your time on poverty alleviation programs and strategies.  But that only addresses one need.  That does not transform people, and a transformed community comes from transformed people, not vice versa.   While it can feel like we are not spending our time as effectively when we spend it getting to know our community and living our daily lives among them, I think the message that we communicate through our lives-that they are valuable; that there is good in this community- in the end impacts more deeply.  

So when I feel frustrated that some of my time is spent in mundane activities like cleaning my room, and walking my new “little sister” to day care, I trust the experiences of others and the sense in my own heart that my life is portraying a message that Soshanguve and those in it are worth my time and my life.

Books that informed and inspired this post and part 1: The Urban Halo, by Craig Greenfield; Living Mission: The Vision and Voices of New Friars, edited by Scott Bessenecker; and Sub-Merge, by John Hayes.

When Incarnational Ministry is Hard

When you’ve been walking around in 90+ degree heat, get home, and there is no cold water to drink.   When you are woken up at 4:30 every morning when your “little brother’s” alarm goes off.  When everybody and their mother asks you why you are single and tries to find you “Mr. Right.” When you feel guilty for having the money to go to town and watch a movie.  When you are constantly asked for money, because you are white, so obviously you are rich (and compared to most people, you are).  When you feel like you will never be able to live up to the missionary who was here before you, because apparently she was perfect.  When you are walking alone and a white couple pulls over to lecture you about how it is not safe to walk alone in the township.  When you see every man approaching you or walking by you as a potential threat, no matter how hard you try not to.  When your friend, who is a single mom, looks sadly in your eyes and tells you she doesn’t believe in love anymore.  When everybody around you is speaking a language you don’t understand, and you hear your name and know they are talking about you but they refuse to tell you what they are saying.  When a 14 year old girl shrugs and mumbles that she will be alone at the institution over Christmas, because not even her extended family members will take her in.  And when you realize you have no idea how to comfort her after a lifetime of everybody who is supposed to love and care for her abandoning her.  When the music in the taxi is so loud in the speaker right behind you that you can feel it pounding in your head-for an hour ride.  When you visit someone’s house and they expect you to eat cow intestine.  When the little girl next door is nearly kidnapped and you realize there is crime all around you.   When conversations seem to grind to a halt due to your own introvertedness and the other person’s limited English proficiency.  When people keep admonishing you to be safe and you want to cry out “since when is following Jesus safe?!!”  Ask the early disciples and church fathers.

 

“Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines, though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in God my Savior.  The Sovereign Lord is my strength; he makes my feet like the feet of a deer; he enables me to go on to the heights.”  Habakkuk 3:17-19

*In case any of you were concerned I was painting too rosy a picture of incarnational ministry.  I believe in incarnational ministry (part 2 coming soon), but that doesn’t mean it’s always easy.

Why I Believe in Incarnational Ministry, Part I

“What on earth are you doing?” said I to the monkey

when I saw him lift a fish from the water and place it on a tree.

“I’m saving it from drowning,” was the reply.

--Anthony de Mello, The Song of the Bird

Many people asked Petunia what they can do to help the kids she ministers among, and she never knew how to answer.  One day she asked the kids what they wanted.  They didn’t ask for food, or shoes, or toys even.  They said they wanted to learn to speak English well.  When she asked them what they would choose between two pieces of KFC (South Africans loooooove KFC-there’s even one in the township) and English classes, they said they would choose English classes.  Too often people might enter the township, see these kids running around without shoes, and decide to buy them shoes.  But these kids see all their friends around them without shoes, and they are fine.  The thought doesn’t even cross their minds that they should be wearing shoes, and they would regard such a gift as something frivolous and unnecessary.  Why do I believe in incarnational ministry?  Because I think too many organizations come to a community, and without getting to know the people implement programs to address what they perceive are their needs.  When you don’t listen to people articulate their own needs and desires, you run the risk of being like the monkey-having the best intentions but hurting those you intend to help, or at best simply being irrelevant.   

Instead of entering a community, buying a bunch of shoes to give away, and then leaving patting ourselves on the back for having done something for the poor, we are getting to know the community as friends and neighbors.  By living with them, celebrating and suffering with them we earn their trust and learn what it is they really need.  Only then can we begin to address those needs.  While I am sometimes impatient to start implementing amazing programs that will transform the community, I realize that I don’t really know where to start yet.  It is only by learning from my friends and neighbors that I can begin to understand what they do need.

Right now, this means that I must focus on meeting and knowing my neighbors.  It means that I must go to the safehouse for orphans and abused children and just hang out with them and befriend them.  It means that there is value in spending time running around outside with the kids in my neighborhood.  While there may be things I can be doing in the meantime, I believe my primary calling is to simply be here.  Jesus said that if you believe in him, “streams of living water will flow from within.”  If I truly have faith that those streams are flowing, then I must believe that simply living here among the people is, in some small miraculous way, bringing new life to the community; that when they look at me and interact with me they can see Jesus.  In that case, even before participating in any programs or “community development” I am making a difference-I am bringing Jesus to those around me.  I figure if Jesus spent 30 years learning and integrating into a community before beginning ministry, I can take some time to take a posture of learning myself; then see where it will lead.

P.S. That’s not to belittle or undervalue those who feel called to buy the shoes.  There is nothing wrong with wanting to give to the poor-the Bible repeatedly encourages believers to give generously.  What is important is to make sure that your giving addresses real needs.  Thus, the givers and those who work among the poor can work together to make sure the giving is most effective.